Rough Draft

The Importance of a Father


Throughout life, it’s important for a girl to have her mother involved in her life, as well as her father. Father’s commonly underestimate the importance of a good relationship with their daughter (Mack). Often, girls do not have a good relationship with their father, whether it’s due to divorce, death, incarceration, of a lack of interest. This is extremely unfortunate because a father is the most important man in a girl’s life (Meeker). The interaction of a father in his daughter’s life affects her emotionally, socially, and physically.

The absence of a father, no matter the reason, emotionally affects a girl in a negative way. Losing a father due to death, divorce, or even due to a lack of interest can be devastating (Mack). To an adolescent aged daughter, the common effects of an absent father are depression and anger (Mack). It’s likely for a number of girls to fear failure and rejection because they feel as though the lack of a good relationship with their father is their fault (Mack). Usually, mothers or mother figures are viewed as the parent who should deal with the emotions of children, especially girls. Phame Camarena, a Purdue University researcher, states, “Dads are generally as important to the emotional well-being and adjustment of their kids as moms are” (Camarena). Purdue University Professor, Pamela Sarigiani, found that eighth grade girls who said they did not have a close relationship with their fathers showed a significantly higher rate of depression than girls who said they have a close relationship with their father (Sarigiani). Sarigiani then stated, “We expected to find the same pattern among girls who said they didn’t get along well with their mothers, but we didn’t” (Sarigiani).

Whether or not a father interacts in his daughter’s life affects her socially. Most importantly, a father’s interactions with his daughter set her up for how she is going to interact in future relationships with other men (Mack). Successful future relationships with males are dependent on a good father-daughter relationship. In her book Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters, Dr. Meg Meeker explains, “Daughters watch their dads like hawks. They watch not only how he treats her, but also how he treats her mom” (Meeker). If a girl has an absent father, it’s likely that she won’t develop good relationships with other males because she didn’t receive what she needed from her father. On the other hand, if a girl has an active father, it’s more likely that she will choose men who treat her well because that is what she experienced and watched at home. When a girl is developing relationships with other males, her father should remember that adolescent age girls have a strong need for male attention and affection (Meeker). Therefore, if he is depriving his daughter of attention and affection, she will proceed to seek it socially from male friendships or from sexual relationships (Meeker).

A good father-daughter relationship also physically affects a girl. Purdue University researcher, Phame Camarena, indicates that a critical time when a girl needs her father is during adolescence, when she is physically changing (Camarena). At this point in adolescence, a girl’s appearance is rapidly changing. Rapid changes, such as those that occur during puberty, often cause insecurities. Ironically, at a point in life and development where a girl may need her dad the most, it’s common for even an active father to pull away because he is uncomfortable with the situation (Camarena). In life changing situations when a father excludes himself from his daughter’s life, she flounders (Meeker). Exclusion will end in mistrust. If a girl learns to trust her father, it will be much easier for her to physically and emotionally trust her future husband along with other men she has relationships with (Meeker).

A father is a necessary person in a girl’s life. Fathers should realize how important they are in their daughter’s life no matter the situation. The way that a father is involved in his daughter’s life affects her not only emotionally, but also socially, and physically.